Wave!– The World is Watching
Friday, June 20th, 2008
As bloggers, we have something to share…. whether it’s information, opinion, emotions or a laugh. It’s what makes us sit down at that keyboard, straighten our thinking caps and assemble that crazy collection of ideas we call a post.
We quickly get comfortable in our blogs, and even in the discussion boards we frequent. Sometimes they become like virtual vacation places. We spend some time there… settle in… and ham, jam and spamalot with the locals.
We even might enjoy a certain impulsiveness in these online vacations. A refreshing break from the routine of face-to-face communications. Online, any thought can be shared in a single click. Any words can be said. Any topic proposed. We feel outside the barriers of normal inter-personal relationships. We feel outside ourselves.
But like any good vacation, eventually we must return to our regular lives. In this case, to the Real World before us. The one that pays the bills. That needs new braces or help with Math homework. The one that hires us. Or is hired by us.
You see, sometimes it gets so comfy in our online vacation homes, it becomes easy to forget that anyone could be out there peering in our windows.
Sure, we might post to entice readers… awaken our fellow bloggers… scream to hear the echo… or just say what we feel needs to be said.
But how personal is too personal? How shocking is too shocking? How will what we post today affect our personal safety? Our relationships with friends and family? Our future job prospects? Our customer relations?
How do we remain true to ourselves and our unique voices, while making sure our online world doesn’t intrude negatively on the three-dimensional one?
I’ve been thinking a lot about this lately. And while I certainly don’t have all the answers, I thought a few suggestions might be a good start for more awareness, greater consideration and better safety for everyone:
- Limit personal information. While most folks know not to share their social security or phone numbers online, it’s also good to omit any information specific enough to be easily located. This means don’t share the name of the place you work, or show photos of the street you live on. And you might not want to take a photo of your car with its license plate showing—no matter how cool your car is.
By giving enough color without specific details, you can stay safe and still entertain readers. - Consider using fake names for family and friends. Many bloggers protect family and friends by being consistent with made-up names to represent each person. Remember that while we’re willingly blogging and putting our lives out there, the people in our lives may not have signed on for this. So think of those around, and how our posts might affect them. Fake names are an option that can help.
- Gain approval of family or friends before posting their stories/photos. Thinking ahead before posting about family or friends, and including their images, is a safe way to prevent future rifts. (Unless, of course, you don’t like those people anyway. ) It takes a little more time, but the extra consideration might be worth it.
- Think, WWED? (What Would Employers Do?) Before posting online, it helps to think, “What would a prospective employer do if he or she saw this?” “How would someone view my character if they didn’t otherwise know me?” If you’re up for a job, employers are likely to research you online. You can have a great resume, but if your potential boss uncovers your post, for example, bad-mouthing your current boss, this could seriously affect their decision to give you the job. Just think a minute about how a post represents you. It’s better to be safe now than sorry later.
- Treat others as you’d like to be treated. I know, I know– it’s corny and preachy. But it’s also true. A little respect goes a long way. And online, because posting is so quick and easy, it’s possible to get carried away and say things we’d never say in person. But online, we have the excellent opportunity to really THINK before we communicate. It never hurts to think first.
Now, okay– you may say you don’t care about having the world know everything about you. Your life is an open book– from your speeding ticket history to your shoe size. And hey, that’s fine, too.
But it only takes a moment to remember those windows out there, opening into our online homes. And sometimes the world is silent. But that also doesn’t mean it’s not still out there, watching.
Jenn, AKA “Thrift Shop Romantic” is not nearly as paranoid as that last sentence makes her sound. A professional writer in an unnamed marketing firm in the Real World, she has a humor blog– Of Cabbages and Kings—and a budget decorating blog, The Thrift Shop Romantic.
June 20th, 2008 at 11:46 am
Good advice, Jenn. I’ve learned no. 3 the hard way. Well, no one was hurt, but I annoyed some people and had to remove a post. I don’t blog anonymously, so I am especially careful about what I say. If I won’t do it in person in real life, I won’t do it here. Given the reality of telephone books, this could still get me into trouble sometime. But I suppose people on the internet have something better to do than look me up. More to the point, my not blogging anonymously means that I fill much of the space on the first page of Google if you search for me. That’s generally a good thing, or so I hope. At least there are no felony convictions, tales of debauchery, or rumors about an evil pointy haired boss.
June 20th, 2008 at 12:03 pm
Very good points you make here. Thanks for the reminders!
June 20th, 2008 at 12:13 pm
I’m w/ Mark. Nothing to hide. I omit some details that I feel are necessary for the protection of my kids but other than that…
June 20th, 2008 at 12:27 pm
Very well written. The last point, especially, has a lot of weight. One thing I would like to add : Never give email IDs that contain your name. It’s always better to use your nickname in your email address. And that is exactly what I’m doing now
June 20th, 2008 at 12:37 pm
You will never locate a real picture of me on the internet; nor will you locate my address, phone number, license plate number, or the names of my close family members. I could be MORE paranoid about my privacy, but that would involve using proxies and fake names for websites like BC.
June 20th, 2008 at 12:45 pm
Dear Jenn,
You have what my Grandmother told me I have, which is good common sense. Your web log gets right to the point and is full of easy to remember tips on the do’s and don’ts of self exposure. What a good reminder to keep something under our hats and your explanations are easy to comprehend. Well done.
June 20th, 2008 at 12:53 pm
Mark- Good to know about your clean record– I was worried.
And yes, there’s added accountability when you’re using your own name, totally depending, though, on your field. Your point that researching these things take time is absolutely true. In most cases, it would never happen. In terms of things like possible child safety risks, etc., you may be dealing with a different element .
K.Fields- Glad to! Thanks for reading.
Shirley- Sure, when you have kids, I think that’s not a bad idea.
Kobra- Well, up until yesterday you were a kitten avatar, so we know you’re a wildcard, Kobra.
June 20th, 2008 at 12:55 pm
Whew, I don’t think I’ve broken any of the rules. Well written and good points!
June 20th, 2008 at 1:09 pm
Well, I think we all know just how private I can be with personal information. There are a few trusted fellow bloggers who might know this or that, but certainly not one who knows everything! I even keep my face covered
Aside from protecting family and friends from unwanted attention, or scaring away prospective employers, internet harassment and identity theft is serious business. If you wouldn’t tell a stranger face to face, don’t broadcast it on the internet!
Great post Jenn!
June 20th, 2008 at 6:36 pm
Good stuff, Jen. We could all stand to remember that information. That is, after all, why I appear to you all in equine form.
June 20th, 2008 at 7:14 pm
You have really provided with reasoning on the why’s and how’s of the need for avoiding intrusion of online world with the real one. Great suggestions!
June 20th, 2008 at 8:14 pm
One thing I don’t really think about, but probably should, is “What would employers do?”
I’ve said I’d rather commit suicide than go to work for someone else again, but that’s not a very good attitude. One never knows what the future will bring–I may be forced to take a job one of these days. But, I mostly keep it pretty clean on my blog, so I’m not too worried.
Great post, by the way!
June 20th, 2008 at 8:47 pm
A lot of people don’t think about the incidentals of information … they don’t give out their last name, but photograph their vehicle with the license plate … and stuff like that.
Good observation!
June 20th, 2008 at 8:53 pm
What a wonderful and informative post. Yes, its so true that we shouldn’t just reveal all our personal information on the web. We do need to be responsible to protect ourselves, our families, and friends.
June 21st, 2008 at 5:29 am
Not that I hope this happens to anyone here, but I read an article about a couple of teens that were arrested because detectives were able to piece together the evidence from their social networking sites.
The article, speaking of MySpace, Xanga and Facebook, said, “Law enforcement officials, however, have another use for them: They are fast becoming a crucial source of evidence in crimes involving young people ranging from pornography to drugs to terrorist threats.” Soruce: http://www.boston(dot)com/news/nation/articles/2006/05/15/teens_online_postings_are_new_tool_for_police/
I think we can all heed your advice and if someone has teens, they really need to be made aware of your article. Great information Jenn. Thanks for the post and your contribution to Blog Catalog!
June 21st, 2008 at 7:00 am
Thanks, gang.
In looking at this in retrospect, one approach I wish I would have thought to take to this article would be direct in-the-media case-in-point examples and stats of what could happen, and how easily information could be pieced together.
I was trying to avoid a hysterical paranoia-geared theme to it in favor of a more calm practicality, but I think overall it probably would have benefited from more concrete positioning to be taken more seriously. As a result, it’s not as heavy-hitting as it could be. I think Anok struck that home very, very well in her BC thread posts related to this article. (Thank you, Anok!! Much appreciated.)
Ah, well– live and learn, eh?
June 21st, 2008 at 11:37 am
Your word of caution about revealing too much is much appreciated and noteworthy. Probably, much depends on your subject matter, as mentioned by others here. Certainly, if you conduct business via the Internet, it’s important to be a bit more revealing, such as expressed by Mark…and that is his real photo, or so I’ve heard.
I personally appreciate you calm approach. I think your message does convey.
June 21st, 2008 at 3:49 pm
Excellent piece, Jenn. While your focus was (appropriately) on bloggers and what they post on their blogs, the same guidelines apply to participation on forums, comments left on articles on news websites, and so on.
People also need to realize that traces of themselves that they leave on the Internet can have considerable longevity. Sometimes it’s good to reflect on this: How will you feel when what you have posted is dredged up by someone 5, 10, 20 years from now? Photos that are goofy (or worse) and prose that is salacious, for example, will be cached and archived along with the ‘proper stuff’ - and available in the future to anyone taking the time to dredge it up. You may delete a post or a photo from your blog, but it is probably archived somewhere anyway. What we write and publish on the web becomes a legacy of sorts.
June 23rd, 2008 at 3:47 pm
Appreciate your safety advises. In my opinion, wearing shades, also help to cover one’s identity.
June 25th, 2008 at 11:19 pm
Thank you for your post, TSR.
I particularly like your Golden Blogging Rule!
July 8th, 2008 at 3:51 pm
Good, common-sense advice. Not that I’m following it, entirely. I’ve posted photos of the street where I live.
I don’t know that I’ve compromised household security much, though. Quite a few of the 4,000 people with whom I share Sauk Centre, Minnesota, know where I live - and ‘all these small town streets look alike.’ For that matter, small town streets look like city streets, outside the downtown area.
Thanks for a good set of reminders.
July 14th, 2008 at 4:17 pm
[...] our online world doesn’t intrude negatively on the three-dimensional one? — Jenn Thorsen in Wave!– The World is Watching For most people being anonymous on the Internet is not a life-or-death matter. You aren’t [...]
August 2nd, 2008 at 1:11 pm
You’ve made some really good points and even made me consider a few things about how my online persona could be viewed from an employors point of view. I have to admit I have not thought about it before; I certainly will be from now on.
August 12th, 2008 at 2:52 am
I think you make some great post. I have forwarded this to my daughter,
Thanks